Hermione's Pain
by Me and Nothing More
Summary: Ever since Hermione finished the war, something has been nagging her. By something I mean It. It is trying to kill her by sending her thoughts and controlling her movements. Can Hermione stand It long enough to find the will to stay alive? Or is it too late for even someone to save her? RATED T JUST TO MAKE SURE.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Guys! It's me, ya know the Dramione shipper. Not a ton of big Dramione moments in this chapter, but more will be coming soon, I promise! **

**Please fill free to give me corrective criticism, or just review. It would make my day! **

**I own nothing, Okay? NOT OKAY! Can you just hand me the rights please? **

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Ron! Wait up!" I start sprinting off to my red-haired almost, but not really boyfriend. Must he always rush away when I follow him? Does he hate me? It'd be no new wonder because almost every one does.

"He probably thinks you're a stalker," I feel someone whisper in my ear. Oh damn it. Not this again. I shake my head trying to get the sound out. Ugh! It starts mumbling and I fall down onto my knees. Pushing up with my hands, I try to get up, but I can't. I look up and see Ron running away, as if I were a disease he doesn't want to catch. No one cares; the attacks have been happening since the war. "Filthy little mud blood," it hisses in my ear. I hate that word. First, all the Slytherins calling me it; now It is. I don't have a name for my little friend that wants me dead. I'm still on my knees pushing on my temples trying to stop It. It's coming, I cn feel it. As almost as if there is a timer counting down, my head feels like it just exploded.. I start pounding my head against the cracked and grey stone floor. Distract yourself, I try but it never works. My bushy hair covers my eyes while tears drip down my face.

"He ran just sprinted away as fast as he could. He doesn't love me. That's obvious. He doesn't even like me!" Ron's running just adds to the excruciating pain. It makes my heart hurt, more then my head. Combining forces of my head and my heart, I feel myself drifting off. I pound my head one last time and collapse on my chest, blacking out.

"Mione? Are you awake?" I hear Harry ask in a curious voice.

"She should be waking up anytime soon," a familiar voice says. It's Madam Pomfrey. I can picture the stern look on her face while she stands there. "She's awake. Hermione we know you're awake."

I just want to stay here for a while. Not feeling anything, lying down, listening to them talk. No more old me. That's gone. I need to change. From now on I will be different. Different, different, different. No bookworm or know-it-all. No bushy hair and normal face. It must be better. It must be the best; it's the only way he will love me, again-if he ever loved me at all.

"Hey guys," I say while plastering a smile onto my face. They all in turn seem to breathe a sign of relief; well, at least Harry does. Ron just sits there, staring off into space. I can see Harry trying to catch his eye, but Ron just keeps staring off at the white infirmary walls. "Why am I in here?" I ask even though I know the answer. Madam Pomfrey gives Ron and Harry a quick shake of her head and turns back to look at me.

"Well, you're in here because you fell and hit your head," Harry says while ruffling his already messy black hair. Most people think I just spend most of my time holed up in a book. I do, but not just that. I also watch people, preform a little occlumency on them and just watch them again.

"Little creep," It always whispers in my ear, but I just ignore it, wincing the least I can from the pain. Maybe if I don't listen it won't even matter. Listening to peoples thoughts and seeing their actions has taught me a lot about them. For Seamus, he always has liked me, even though I find him repulsive! For Ginny, well she has that insane crush on Harry, which everyone knows about, but that's not it. She also has an obsession with, um, well, his ass. I choose not to repeat those words, for the sake of my wellbeing. Picturing Harry's, and I quote, "Firm and soft butt cheeks," does not make me sing in delight. I actually feel like throwing up. I would never perform occlumency my friends, goodness no! Also, I've never done it on Draco, never had the desire to.

"Hello?" he pauses, and I don't respond, just staring off into space. "Hermione? You okay?" Harry says while glancing at Madam Pomfrey.

"Oh yes, I'm fine. Sorry about that, zoned out for a bit." I turn my head towards Madam Pomfrey, "Can I leave?" Seeing her hesitate, I rush out," I have some Transfiguration homework to do and I really can't miss any classes! It being the beginning of the school year, the teachers must think I'm ditching class!"

Madam Pomfrey pauses, contemplating the pros and cons of me leaving. She finally sighs and says,"Let me give you one more check up and you are free to go. Eat some chocolate first, it'll make you feel better." I smile then wait for the voice to come back and bring me down. It doesn't. Exhaling in relief I proceed to stand up, grabbing onto the bedside table. Harry and Ron have already left, and Madam Pomfrey gives me a very thorough check over before she allows me to go. When I am packing up my bag that was left here, I start to wonder who brought me to the infirmary. Madam Pomfrey rushes in with some chocolate and pushes it into my hand.

Feeling the inkling to ask who my 'rescuer' was I turn to look at Madam Pomfrey and say, "Do you know who brought me here?" She puts her finger on her chin, as if pondering the pros and cons of telling me. "I think it was that boy with the white hair. Your grade. He ran if with you in his arms as if you were a wounded gazelle and he was trying to heal you," pausing she thinks for a moment. "What is his name?"

Inquiring I speak," If I may ask, do you know if this boy is in Slytherin?" I know it's not true the moment it comes out. Why would Malfoy be coming to help me! A poor Mudblood. I even cringe back at that word. Not a second to late Madam Pomfrey screams in the kind of Aha! voice you use when a lightbulb goes off above your head. "Yes he was! Draco, Draco Malfoy." I feel my mouth drop open. Draco? Draco was my brave hero? Why didn't he just leave me there, the Mudblood that I am. After mumbling a thanks to Madam Pomfrey and grabbing my bag, I hurry out of the room, not wanting to miss any more class time.

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**Sorry about the horrible writing and grammar. Can you tell me how to fix it? Got any cool ideas? Just want to lie and say this is the best fan fiction you have ever read? Just wanna say it is good enough for you? I don't care. Just please, please, please, review. Thanks!**

**xoxo- me and nothing more **


	2. Chapter 2

**HEY! I'm Back! None of y'all reviewed last time, so I'm wondering if I should continue this story. It is the first FanFiction I have ever posted and I'm getting no feedback, so I don't know if it's good or not. Well, please review because it would make my day.**

**DISCLAIMER: I own everything! Well, I wish. All rights to J.K. Rowling and all that jazz. **

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"I have to figure out how I am going to do this new look," I whisper to myself. "Should I ask Ginny? No, she'll say I'm beautiful the way I am even though I know I'm not." I get back to my room to find that Draco's already in it. "Fuck," I mumble as I walk past him. I forgot that I share a living quarters with him now that I am head girl and he is head boy. I really wish Mcgonagal would have given the head boy slot to someone more deserving like, Harry or… Ron. Just hearing Ron's name sends shivers up my back. "Your doing this for him, your doing this for him." I repeat over and over in my head to make sure I get it. If this is the only way he will like me, then let it be. I drop my bag off in the common room then go to grab all my hair products, brushing past Malfoy on the way to the bathroom. He doesn't even glance my way, just continuing to read the Daily Prophet. Wait, why is he reading the Daily Prophet? He hates that newspaper. Wait, why do I know this about him? Convincing myself it's just because I am forced to see him every day, I continue to make my way to the bathroom. Does Hogwarts even have plugs?Finally finding one under the sink, I plug in my straightener, a muggle product that makes hair straight for short periods of time, and turn it on as high as it can go. I put some products in my hair all the way chanting, "It's the only way he'll love you, the only way." Why can't he realize what an ass Lavender is, or are they broken up and he is with his slut of the week? I start to straighten my hair and I feel It to come back. As if It can control what I do, my hand somehow grips the straightening iron and I cry out in pain.

"Serves you right, you little bitch," it hisses in my ear. Screaming like a banshee I pry my fingers away one by one. Malfoy waltzes in and swiftly unplugs the straightener. I quickly shove my hand under the faucet sink, sighing at the relief from the clear water running down my hand. I let a tear fall when I hear a soft puff. Turning quickly I wipe my tear and straighten up. In the process, my hand comes out from under the faucet and It sends a new pain through my arm. Malfoy leaves and I groan annoyed. First, acting like he cares, then rushing out and acting as if he doesn't care about me? Typical Malfoy. All of a sudden the bathroom door opens again and Malfoy strides in with his wand at the ready. I go to my back pocket, where I usually keep my wand, but remember I put it in my school bag, which is in the common room. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

All of a sudden Malfoy goes, "Petrificus Totalus" locking my legs and arms to my body in a full body bind. I try to scream out at him to tell him to get out, but it comes out as a high mumble. Damn you Malfoy. All of a sudden he comes over to me and grabs my burnt hand. I almost forgot about it. Digging his wand into my hand so I start a whimpered scream, he repairs my hand in a heartbeat. Unlocking me from the full body bind he puts out a hand to pull me up. I grab it with my newly healed hand and pull myself up. Spitting out the first comment that comes to my brain, I poke my finger into his chest and scream, "What was that for?"

He just stands there chuckling, as if he didn't just put me in a full body bind and try to kill me. Well, he didn't try to kill me, but he could have!

"Well! What was it for? Just felt like terrorizing the Mudblood didn't you?" He cringes back at the word and I am confused. Although confused, I don't let that stop me from screaming my ass off at him. "Have a little fun there did you? Favorite thing to do? Ugh! You're just like your father!" I turn around to leave but he grabs me by my robes and shoves me against the bathroom counter so my back is pressing into the sink enough to hurt.

" Now you listen carefully. I am nothing like my father," pausing he screams, "You hear me? Nothing. Don't ever say that again." With each word he utters I am pushed back a little more into the counter and he comes closer. His breath is on me, smells like peppermint and butter beer. I just stare at him for a minute. I take in his white blonde hair and his breath-taking grey eyes. Since we are in the common room he isn't wearing his robes, but a black shirt and this close to him I can feel each sculpted muscle in his body against mine. I never noticed this, but he is not that much taller than me. It must be his presence whenever I am around him, but he makes me feel like a mouse, and he is the lion that is about to eat me for dinner.

"Ahem." He says clearing his throat. I haven't realized how long I have been staring at him. I can feel my cheeks getting red and look down to hide my face. He pulls it up with one finger, but suddenly jerks it back mumbling to himself, "No. No," and a few other words that I can't understand. "Enjoying the view?" he says looking into my eyes and bringing back the signature Malfoy smirk.

"Shut up Malfoy."

"Hey, I'm just a casual observer watching you stare at my beauty. It must be absolutely devastating that you can't stare at me every moment of everyday. Who knows, you might like what you see; but oh no. I don't think Potter will approve of that. After all, we are supposably sworn enemies fighting for each others heads on platters." He turns away and walks out, leaving me there open-mouthed and speechless. I fight the urge to run after him and spin him around to say a snarky comment that will get us ripping each others throats out again.

Turning around to the mirror, I find that my face still has a few stray tears dangling here and there. I brush them away with the back of my hand and splash my face with cold water to remove the redness. You didn't just think Malfoy was hot, did you? I mean, he does have muscles, but so does Ron. They might just not be a prominent, but he does have them, right? Right. So who cares that he rendered me speechless? Not me, that's who! I assure myself that I absolutely have no attraction what so ever towards Malfoy and plug in my straightening iron again, reminding myself to be more careful this time. Wait, why am I not just using a spell? There you go again Hermione, proving to yourself that you are just a failure for being "The Brightest Witch of Your Age." Stupid, stupid, stupid. Just a simpleminded, dense, unintelligent, and deficient girl.

I pull the chord of the straightening iron to unplug it, wrap it up and carry it to my room peeking out of the bathroom door before exciting. I quietly shut my bedroom door, go to my shelf and grab my, Beauty Wands, book that and I quote, is supposed to, "Make you feel better and look better with a few simple quick and easy spells! No harsh potions or screeching novels needed! In this copy of Beauty Wands, you will find all your magical needs from hair removal to princess attire in a moments notice!" A load of horse shit if you ask me, but Ron bought t for me saying to "clean myself up." I never consider it before, priding myself in being me, but desperate times call for desperate measures. I plop myself onto my bed and lie down with my nose to the book. Flipping through the pages I find a easy hair straightening spell to do. I start to work on it by transfiguring items into hairy objects to straighten. Finally getting it right, I go to bed early because we have Potions tomorrow morning at eight, and I don't feel the need to exert myself to the point of death-well, at least not at this moment.

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**Not in love with this chapter, so I would love it if you guys commented on what I need to improve on when I'm writing. Sorry about the bad grammar. Please Review! Thanks! **

**xoxo-Me and Nothing More**


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